“We’ve always been dog friendly, but we wanted to push the boundaries of what that means to our workforce and community as a whole,” explained Chris Widmayer, Penrod CEO. “Dogs have immeasurably enriched our lives, and we felt compelled to return the favor in a big way, especially on National Pet Day. So we hired Tom.”
Tom brings absolutely zero Salesforce certifications to the Penrod family, which isn’t surprising…because he’s a dog. As a Pawject Manager, Tom will serve on the frontlines of Penrod’s delivery team to ensure customers are provided with exceptional solutions and that projects stay on track.
“Dogs have everything we look for in great employees”, notes Matt Fiel, Director of Marketing. They’re loyal, kind, friendly…I mean, they can’t type for shit, but, we’re working on that. Unfortunately, it really comes down to the fact that they lack opposable thumbs.”
Caption: Tom contributing absolutely nothing to yet another meeting.
Tom joins his mother, Kim Oakes, who has worked in revenue operations at Penrod for over a year.
“I’m so proud of my son,” Kim gushed. “I always knew Tom would do something special, but becoming a Salesforce professional at just 5 years old is…I’m just lost for words.”
Although dogs have no use for money, Tom is being paid handsomely in milk bones, belly scratches, butt rubs, and food from trash cans that most employees at Penrod would probably never eat.
“Tom just beelines for the trash can when he arrives every morning”, Kim explained. “He just loves trashed food. I’ve thought about telling him to stop, but I’m not his boss…I’m just his mom.”
“Tom just took a dump in the breakroom, but to be honest I still couldn’t be happier,” Matt explained as he vigorously scrubbed the urine-soaked carpet by his desk. “Honestly, I think he deserves a raise.”
When asked for comment, Tom wagged his tail, curled into a ball, and got ready for his next priority…the sixth nap of his first day.
Happy National Pet Day, everyone!